10 Signs You're a Parent

1. Those bags under your eyes are bigger than Ferragamo's latest thing.
It's true. Recently, Daddy and I were at Istana Budaya for Anna and The King and we noticed some other couples (besides us) who looked really tired. So we asked them - do you have young children? The answer was an affirmative "Sigh, yes".

2. You have no issues doing things that used to gross you out.
Here's the short list - blow your child's nose, change your baby's diaper, wash your child's butt, clean up some vomit, mop up a peeing accident. And this includes doing them mid-way through a meal, AND THEN continuing with your meal after you're done washing your hands.

3. Suddenly your house/ car/ handbag is awash with stickers.
Oh, where do I start with this one? We have gymbobs stickers on my car glove compartment and left side window, a KOKO Krunch car sticker on the right side window, a variety of McDonald's stickers on a vase upstairs, some Spongebob and Winnie the Pooh stickers on the lounge cabinet. My handbag used to host many stickers but - oh dear too bad - they fell off. In fact, at one point we even had a Lightning McQueen sticker on the shower tap in my bathroom.

4. You stop judging other people's children.
That's because you realise Oh Crap my children do that too. Enuf said!

5. You also eat those words you said before you became a parent.
Words that sound something like "I'll never do THAT when I HAVE children." I've eaten so many words, I should have put on weight by now. This is somewhat related to #4 above.

6. The volume of your voice goes up a few decibels.
Which is when it hits you, "Ah, so THAT'S why I always hear neighbour so-and-so's voice." Many times when your children don't respond to suggestions given in a nice, soft tone of voice it's time to up those decibels and change that suggestion into a threat of some sort.

7. When you go somewhere new, you automatically look for the loo first.
This is especially so when you have a semi-toilet trained child. You want to make a beeline for the loo so that when he blurts out, "Mummy, I want to kencing", you don't leave a "trail".

8. Things you hid from your children remain hidden for a long time.
That's because you forgot where you hid them. This has happened to us many times. Daddy suggested I make an 'inventory' of where we hide things at the time when we hid them but that would involve remembering to do that.

9. Cabinets or bookshelves become top heavy as you put things out of their reach.
Watch out, it might start raining forbidden things, like computer accessories or batteries, for example.

10. You don't need a clock anymore.
You judge time either by the children's shows on TV ("it's now time for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse", or "we'll leave right after "Fireman Sam", or "ok, it's bathtime after Thomas") or by their activities ("you can have some spaghetti after Tumble Tots").